Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Over the past three years, five friends have died all before the last statement could be achieved. Realizing that death is not simply waiting at the end of the road, but an ever looming possiblity, has been uniquely sobering. After the initial need to console and insure the well being of the immediate family comes time for personal reflection. The most startling are the unique moments of clarity; those times when suddenly while driving, talking with friends, listening to music, or cooking, when you realize that you simply are. You grasp for a single instance that you are alive and not simply watching some ongoing, often times very boring, movie. In that clarity the sky is indeed blue, a summer afternoon truly is the finest time to read a book and drink a beer, running with no direction or purpose is as close to flying as we'll get, and loss really is permanent. The slap in the face that this is only what it is and at anytime it may slip away stings brilliantly.
Governor: the Sequel

My God what a gorgeous man! The only thing that could make this more fallic is a banana in one hand and a barber pole next to the Washington monument in the background. Sweet zombie Jesus I haven't seen a depiction of purebred teutonic virility since the Leni Riefenstahl film "Goebbels: An Aryan Cock for Victory." It's actually possible to be impregnated by looking at this picture too long. That's your governor California. I knew there was reason I had disdain for SoCal. Don't get me wrong. I loved the Terminator, Commando. eh Twins, not so much. But everyone knows that sequels suck. Governor2:Full Term should be a brilliant spectacle full of all the high budget effects, big name stars and plenty of trailers. Unfortunately, much like Arnies movie career, it may be a little thin on the writing. But Hey, that never mattered much. He looks so good on that horse how can he not be the big dick swinging take charge governor that California needs. I think his campaign platform should focus on his promise not to make movies while in office. Somthing like-Schwarzenegger in '06 in theatres in '10. It could be more of a threat. "If I lose, I'll start making movies again"! That's a double edged sword. All the neglected California republican action film buffs have been hard up since Arnie went into politics. Their starving for a 'Schwarzenegger v. the entire Middle East' flick. Bullets and grenades flying, dead brown people all around, evil God and America hating terrorists in pieces, and Arnie dropping the on liners in between turning Muslims into blood sprinklers. There hasn't been a good Goddamn movie to come out of hollywood in a decade, what with Chuck doin' Walker on the TV and Stallone turnin' into a girl. It would also work against those of refined sensibilities who 'view cinema' instead of watching movies. Would four more years of the Governator be worth it if only to prolong the release of Junior2, or the sequel to True Lies, True Truth? California can't be any more messed up can it? At least there will be plenty of time to stew on it. Just like any big blockbuster, the trailers start now but it won't be in theatres for a year
'By the way, if anyone here is in advertising or marketing, kill yourself. Thank you, thank you. Just a little thought. I'm just trying to plant seeds. Maybe one day they'll take root. I don't know. You try. You do what you can. Kill yourselves. Seriously though, if you are, do. No really, there's no rationalization for what you do, and you are Satan's little helpers, OK? Kill yourselves, seriously. You're the ruiner of all things good. Seriously, no, this is not a joke. "There's gonna be a joke coming..." There's no fucking joke coming, you are Satan's spawn, filling the world with bile and garbage, you are fucked and you are fucking us, kill yourselves, it's the only way to save your fucking soul. Kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself now. Now, back to the show.
"You know what Bill's doing now, he's going for the righteous indignation dollar, that's a big dollar, a lot of people are feeling that indignation, we've done research, huge market. He's doing a good thing." Godammit, I'm not doing that, you scumbags, quit putting a godamn dollar sign on every fucking thing on this planet!'
-Bill Hicks
It may be a harsh sentiment, but I think Bill was on the right track. I'm not some ignorant idealist believing in a billboard free utopia; however, It seems there is some great disconnect between what 'advertising' means and what has become its' intent, and how we perceive it. We connect commercial success with quality and visibility with determination. Eventually we make a subconscious connection between visibility and quality, and brand loyalty is born. Of course it all equals money. In order to be a commercial success one must make money. If you got more money you got more success. If you start with more money than the next guy after you advertise everyone believes you are better than the next guy.
Advertise v. To make public announcement of, especially to proclaim the qualities or advantages of (a product or business) so as to increase sales.
Advertising is therefore intended to inform the market. Yet we now accept and perceive advertising as a means of persuasion. Open ended phrases, NEW, IMPROVED, ULTRA, ORGASM GAURANTEED, are initially recognized by most consumers as just that, phrases with no direct qualification. Yet they've become so ubiquitous that we accept them and eventually start to believe them. Marketing has gone past the point of information to that of mass cajolery and often time dull thudding brainwashing. The jumper cables have been biting into our nuts for so long now that we don’t even resist anymore. ‘Goddamn that third blade was even better than two! Hand me another tissue, I think I cut an artery” "What!? MORE FROSTING!!!!! More, more, more, give daddy his morning fix!" We believe the banners and billboards and accept only those that have the power to advertise. Of course this is the typical tirade of the paranoid. Oh, and I’m poor as well, so maybe its bitterness. Probably bitterness. Dammit though, isn’t there room for integrity? Isn’t there room for clarity and critical choice? Is the sum of our being simply kneeling before the altar of commerce and slitting our own wrists enjoying the euphoric sensation as our green slips onto the reliquary? Is it some burnt offering to appease the plastic boxed gods we see every night on the TV? 'They promised. I saw the titties! they promised! I'm drinking the beer . Where's the titties!?"
So here's the link (SF Examiner) to something I found particularly repulsive. Especially since it involves my chosen industry.
If you really think advertising is generally harmless, or even beneficial, then I suggest looking at this page concerning soft drink companies and advertising (these companies are in no danger of not turning a profit mind you) and shoving your head further into you own asshole.
Here's another link (Tom Waits). I was in an argument. My proponent advocated blind consumption. If you like the music buy the music, no matter how ridiculous, obscene, arrogant, offensive etc. the musician/group is. Hard to disagree with. I also find that most of what I consume, musically at least , reflects a certain level of integrity. (a brief disclaimer. Dammit. I'm not not goint to listen to Miles, Mingus, Parker, Coltrane, McClean, etc. just cuz they pimped and/or slammed smack. They were fucking geniuses. They created entirely new sub genres of music and are therefore exempt. I guess what I'm saying is this; the level of your genius is directly proportional to the bad shit you may do that I'll forgive you for. Jacko excluded, crazy is just crazy.)
I by no means am saying commercial success=selling out. I am saying that advertising budget does not necessarilly equal quality, integrity, viability or (most importantly) truth.
"You can tell the ideals of a nation by its advertisements." Norman Douglas
Damn you George Lucas

The Stars Wars cycle is complete. Save for the boundless re-iterations of DVD packages we can safely sit back and reflect on Lucas's career, and most importantly his legacy Star Wars (seeing as outside of that he's done approximately jack shit). Surely this master shill is sitting atop his pile o' merchandising cash chuckling smugly as he surveys the majesty of skywalker ranch. One can safely review and assess the bearded ones career because he is most assuredly retired. When the last film went in the can all Lucas had to do was watch the machine roll along like some shadow combine harvesting ripe geek cash. I imagine he'll spend the rest of his years much like he did the eighties, wallowing in glory and money, 'executive producing', occasionally writing some chunk of derivitive tripe, and mostly not caring because he is one rich son of a bitch. Meanwhile my peers gracefully worship at a huge brazen George atop the great hipster geek altar, empty Mt Dew bottles, candy wrappers and memorabilia strewn before it. We (everyone cognizant and impressionable when the original trilogy was released) all are indebted to the liberating and generation defining film, yet damn if somethin' don't feel quite right. While I too hold Star Wars in deeply intimate regard (I still have the sheets I got for christmas in 1977) what has become of the property belies Georges true talents.
I wasn't expecting a grand return to my childhood when I heard the prequels were in the making. I was looking for an escape, a romp populated by familiar character and places. What I got was tiresome cliche, thin and annoying characters, questionable casting, stilted and unnatural dialogue, and one giant fucking newt that should have been squashed shortly after the credits rolled in the first movie. It lead me to reassess George Lucas. Without getting into specifics (I'll leave that to film geek sites) George is a film student with a Hollywood budget. Tarrentino with a degree and no sense of style, or ability to direct for that matter. His is a study in his influences, predominantly Kurosawa. He's credited with revolutionary special effects yet 2001: A Space Odyssey, a film that came out 9 years before the orginal Star Wars, looks better. Ultimately a film school graduate and nothing more. Yet Star Wars was, to say the least, uh...huge.
The following movies established Lucas as a very lucky and rich man. Their life on the screen pales in comparison to Fast food cups, action figures, breakfast cereals, toothpaste, books, video games etc. He inspired an entire genre whose sole intention is to spawn labeled crap for us to consume, throw on shelves, and eventually resell on e-bay for several times its shelf price (only of you've kept it mint!). In order for a science fiction, or fantasy for that matter, film to be made it must prove it's marketability, it's ability to generate revenue well after it's out of the theatre. Science fiction as a genre has subsequently suffered. Instead of awareness expanding films utilizing fantastic settings to comment on our own perception we are left with 90 minute commercials. Thanks George and fuck you.
Of course he didn't foresee that tremendous impact. He was just trying to make an enjoyable and fun movie. That's why I don't blame him for Star Wars, or even Empire. Every movie following though is another nail holding the thesis on the door. The dollar signs occluded his already myopic vision as a filmmaker. He went for the LCD. Not that the previous films were unaccessable high brow cinema, they did contain a level of simple minded integrity. Unfortunately as soon as those leather clad little gerbils strolled out in Jedi we could see the real George working. What was going through his mind? "I want to see a stuffed ewok in everyone car rear window. I want to see ewoks on every back pack of every little girl going to school, I want to see ewoks every year in their very own christmas special." He found his niche, his true calling. I bet he's real pissed he didn't come up with Hello Kitty, Pokemon, or My Little Pony. He ceased to care about the monster he created, and never truly controlled. As long as it generated income sign on the bottom line. Here's were we get to the crux of the biscuit. You, Mr. Lucas, are limited in talent and ability. Instead of being the one hit wonder that so many other marginally talented directors are, you struck the mediocrity jackpot; one property that could insure you wealth and influence for the rest of your life. Like some mediocre golfer winning the Masters, you now have a green jacket and are mentioned with real filmmakers. You milked it dry without any regard to artistic direction or your own personal vision. A true craftsman always controls his medium. He has a vision for the entire project and if not walks away from it. If only you could have walked away from it.
' We can fly
Ain't nothin' between here. Nothin' - I never been anywhere but here, and I've been here too long. I know here is were i'm gonna die.'
Can't stay, can't stay here just to die.
'If you and me headout real summer like we can live forever. We can fly and fall in love. Just you and I.'
We can ride and watch life strip away; bark off birch. Only if we leave.
Leave only truth and glistening sappy love. Paint that wild wicked little trip from fleshy hate to belief in tar and dust. A twisted tiny world of our limbs and length. Flying in clouds of dust. Sweet, sweet, dust.'
http://www.malevole.com/mv/misc/tribute/
Where did it go?
Now its over a decade later. I don't listen to those bands anymore. There aren't many recordings out there. In that time radio stations have devoted themselves to their 'new' music, alternative music. As this wave of vanilla shadows those who cut ground before them we're left in the same boat as we were in '90. Teen Idols, reprocessed rock and fakers playing the role of the rock star. It seems that those posing now as alternative have influences only too obvious, posing in a manner that is too familiar. There is now a directive, a mold, a process in which to be alternative. Experimenting with form has been left to the avant and those driven by more singular purposes. Only the dinosaurs of eighties post punk remain, kicking and screaming, still making it their way, diy. Where are the dangerous rock stars? Where are the relentless, untiring, self destructive egomaniacs? Where are my rockstars?
Happy Holloween Douche Bag
It's a column, but the reality is irrefutable. Cheney is a fucker
There's a good chance i hate you
A little conspiracy never hurt anyone.
Sure conspiracy theories are generally relegated to the novelty genres of journalism, but damn if there isn't something to them every now and again. There may be no grand illuminati, or homoereotic ivy league boys club running things but what there is is a distinct segregation of have and have not. The majority of our law makers and world leaders are members of an elite class that has allowed them distinct advantages in accessing power and wealth (virtual synonyms). Given that the myth of secret world government and new world order are just that, myth. What there is, is a great rift in perception and morality. Actions that we, as a nation, have been so opposed to publically are now our dirty little secrets. There is a consistent disgregard for the welfare of all instead of the privilaged few. As if by benefitting corporate and elite America we all are to gain.
'Men rise from one ambition to another: first, they seek to secure themselves against attack, and then they attack others.'-Niccolo Machiavelli
My little fuckin' media corner
1)Layer Cake: Watched it this morning. Enjoyable addition to the British gangster genre. Almost overly twisted plot. Nice character play though. Something that most of the other films in the genre miss. "Suprise" ending a little too derivitive of gangster films.
2) Ikiru: Holy fucking shit dude. I could go on forever like some prissy little film school bitch, but this is one of the finest films I have seen. It is personal, charming, evocative, and a slap to the old consciousness. Beatifully filmed, one of the most chillingly sweet scenes in any film. It's no Jerry "Pull your fucking strings my little marionette" Maguire. It actually evokes emotion not because some schlub is utilizing cinematic tools and cliches, but because Kurosawa stays true to the story and tells it honestly and so terribly humanly. Oh and we all gotta die sometime.
3) Seventh Seal: Just to stay on the doom and fucking gloom kick Bergmans study of one mans literal and internal confrontation with death is simply beautiful. Of course we're supposed to like it because everyone has said it's good. But sometimes it's true. THE MOVIE IS REALLY FUCKING GOOD! He pulls these characters out and gives them flesh bone and soul in little time, meanwhile issuing a very real question concerning existence, death and the afterlife. Yeah, yeah, yeah I'm just a snobby pseudo intellectual fuck. At least I think. Besides it's not that hard to follow, if you have half a functioning brain.
4)Kung Fu Hustle: Kick ass fun. I'm always amazed when I see a film that does slapstick and sight gags well. It's a lost fucking art in Hollywood.
5)Requiem for a Heavyweight: Fuck right heavyweight. Jackie Gleason at his sleasiest, Anthony Quinn at his palookaist and Mickey Rooney at his lackiest. Great story and a real nice film from the creater of the Twilight Zone. No way in hell this movie gets made now. But then again I'm just a crumudgeon that likes a fucking story and some acting to go along with my eye candy.
6)Last Life in the Universe: A Thai film that has a disturbing pace and effect. An odd and sweet? story about a suicidal, OCD, Japanese librarian working in Thailand because his brother (Yakuza) got in a little trouble back in Osaka. Anyway he gets hooked up with a Thai girl who's sister has just died, in part because of the main character. It's a sweet melancholy story of misfits healing one another. The film Garden State wishes it was.
7)To Have and Have Not: Humphrey fucking Bogart and Lauren Bacall. I know, Bogey didn't really act, he just played himself, and Bacall played the same role over and over. But they both do it so well. Once again not to get all gooey about the golden age of Hollywood, but there is rarely that sort of on screen chemistry. The closest I've seen in recent film is Eyes Wide Shut. Were perhaps the real issues were influencing Tom and Nicole.
8) Underground: A long movie. A quick watch. It's over the top. It's absurd. It's a damn good movie. It follows a small group of Yugoslavians from WWII to the most recent conflict to hit the area. Two best friends are new members in the communist party. They steal from the rich to further the populist movement. After Germany invades Yugoslavia, one friend hides the other in a secret small arms factory in his basement. For fifty years the friend and a group of loyalists stay in the basement manufacturing small arms under the belief that the Nazis are still occupying Yugoslavia. It's a bucket of laughs, no really it's pretty damn funny. And an interesting view of what happened to the once nation of Yugoslavia.
Oh Sweet years
I remember all those years in college (there were many of them trust me). Sitting around drinking beers smoking a little weed. There was always the ubiquitious self anointed idealist telling us how it was all going to be different with them. "I'm going to guatamala and get these sweet bracelets and I'm gonna bring 'em back and sell 'em" "then I'm going to asia, I don't know man, I just wanna travel. I'm not going to be like my folks". Ten years later, their driving a lexus suv with a sierra club bumper sticker, still going to wide spread panic shows, expressing how different they really are by the Bob Marley poster hanging in their cubicle. As they grow a little older their politics start to become more centric (there is a scientific ratio that corralates the amount of money you make to your political voting trends). Eventually their sitting around the club sipping scotch regailing everyone with the stories of their wild youth. Bitter because they weren't more free, bitter that they were never as free as they thought they were. Attached to a lifestyle.
My little fuckin' record corner
Here's a few I've been listening to recently.
The Beatles, "The White Album": Love 'em or hate 'em this is still one of the most important albums of all time. The beatles have single handedly shaped pop music for the past 40 years. Few artists have not been influenced in some way by the band or this album.
Buddy Miles, "Them Changes": Best known for his work with Jimi Hendrixs' the Experience, Miles had a couple great albums of his own. Them Changes features the title track with horns and a tight seventies groove. His vocals on Neil Youngs 'Down by the River' are nails, and his version of Greg Allmans dreams smokes. He has a great voice, the band is sharp, the arrangements are solid. At times you can hear what modern rock/soul/jam bands want to be.
Willie Nelson' "Stardust": Great songs sung by a great song stylist. His is one of the unique voices of American popular music with a distinct ear towards melodic interpretation. He gives life to the lines he sings. He wears the melody more like a comfortable shirt than the heavy yoke most singers carry. Some of the produciton value dates the album a bit but the fact that it's Willie singing great tunes overshadows that.
JJ Johnson "Dial": A great lead man who was usually in the shadow of others. I first started listening to him with Charlie Parker. A talented improvisor with exceptional skill with a bitch of a horn. He shows his hand in this album with bandleading and arranging. This album, while not earth shattering, is as good as any mainstream jazz album of the era.feat. Bobby Jaspar, Tommy Flanagan, Wilbur Little, and Elvin Jones.
James Brown "Slaughters Big Rip-Off": This is a great example of a great band on top of it's game. While not the best work on James Browns part, the band is as tight as ever. Some interesting bits with Lyn Collins backed up by the JB's. Fred Wesley arranges some fine horn parts, not Browns best work but a gem for the sake of the JB's
